Poetries
There is no light without darkness. No joy without sorrow. Part of living fully is to learn to dance in all shades and tones. My wish for my clients is to lead healthy, meaningful, and joyful lives – to find grace, even in ungraceful moments, amidst the darkness we all inevitably face as human beings.
Welcome to my personal library of poems – an eclectic collection of stories, contemplative musings, kaleidoscopic imagination, and tender expressions of the soul, written since the early days of my journey as a therapist, many moons ago.
I hope it leaves you, dear reader, feeling some sort of a way.
-
an orange swirl of
cream, caramel, and salt
a play on lightness and warmth flowing to my toes
i can almost taste its air-whipped, tangy, mousse-like texture
marrying into a citrus scent of nectar
a lover’s liquid-golden touch
a melancholy waltz
the soft sun
the star of the show
makes its mellow descent
across the dripping sky canvas of heavens
and into the turquoise gates of the sea-washed kingdom
i am lulled under its spell…
i am drowsy
in the intensified honey glow
my eyelashes flutter shut
like the closing scene of the final act
lush blood-red curtains falling into place
ripe, rosy, fragrant
i inhale it fully
this milky smooth mélange
of soul and peace
all found in a wholesome
brew of orange
swimming in a flavourful cup of tea
a treat
that i have swallowed whole
from which i became warmth itself
even upon the amber orb’s departure
Footnote: An ode to simply being here on this planet, at this very moment.
-
Have you ever considered
what it would be like to hold a conversation with your shadows?
Familiarize yourself with them.
Invite them to dinner.
Ask them what they are afraid of,
and why.
After all:
there are strange and wonderful things
in these lands of darkness,
and you might learn a thing or two
about the secrets of you.
Footnote: When shadows become friends.
-
12:58AM:
a dreamer on the rooftop
she fell in love with the sadness of the city lights
but the light in her eyes
still remained bright
throughout the milky smoke of the night,
she wouldn’t have minded sharing this lovely night
a dreamer on the sidewalk
he sat in solitude against a lamppost
mouth curled, eyes closed
he basked in the husky tunes of the saxophone
among the slow humming of the city noise
wondering if anyone else feels as lonely tonight,
for he wouldn’t have minded sharing this lovely night
Footnote: An imaginary scene about loneliness, longing, and hope. Please note that “she” and “he” are only used narratively and can be used interchangeably to reflect, embrace, and honour all forms of identities, relationships, and expressions of love!
-
she makes me think of
wildflowers
growing freely & unapologetically
she is beautiful.
for she surrenders her heart to the brightness of living
until she’s breathing
energy itself
found growing even in unlikely places
she occasionally blooms in
cracks & crevices
but she needn’t fear
the darkest of nights
for despite being delicate
she is strong
drenched but not drowning
all wildflowers know
how to weather a storm
Footnote: On being alive; on resiliency.
-
the pull is strong
falling into the orbit of
old patterns
so familiar
that I feel it
expanding and contracting
in my bones:
the structure to my home.
tell me
how does one
change the foundation of childhood
without the risk of
capsizing?
where can I
seek refuge?
Footnote: On breaking free from childhood trauma. Trauma refers to anything that distresses and overloads one’s system. -
And then there was
silence
after the storm.
the dust settles,
the whirlwind gone –
but now I feel
like I don’t belong,
I don’t belong.
for I am chaos
with my human yearnings.
how do I learn
the art of
quietening
and sitting
still
in
this
SILENCE?!
Footnote: A reflection on how it can be hard to let go of mayhem, especially when it’s all you’ve ever known. The chatter is what feels familiar, while the new is different. New can be scary. But new can be good.
-
One night:
in the midst of a thunderstorm
I had ripped open my life tapestry
in a macabre fashion,
witness all its contents
burst forward
in extraordinary speed,
just in time to taunt me.
it was madness at play –
and as reckless as it may seem,
I was simply an orchestrator
searching for a cathartic
release,
teetering in between the unhinged edge
of morbid fascination
and an insatiable hunger for
self-destruction.
neither part of me
could tell
whether it was more delicious
or horrifying.
spring in my steps
feverish fingers,
I plucked till red,
till I could taste fire and tears.
in circles I danced,
faster and faster –
unwaveringly agitated,
lavishly desperate,
entangled in threads,
wild hair matted,
fist after fist
after fist
after fist.
a fitful trance.
oh how there’s exhilaration
in unravelling acceleration.
And – my. god.
the crescendo,
it is beautiful!
to unleash
the Wrath –
I trembled in its presence,
tearing apart
like a mortal wound,
louder than the roars of the sky,
of what appears to be a lifetime of tragedies
spilling forward.
and fearlessly,
within this chasm,
I fell into a prostrated
position,
allowed it to swallow
me
whole –
enraptured in
an unmarked burial site,
awashed,
anew,
in the dead of the night.
this was how
acceptance was born –
with all-mighty
rawness and
sensual clarity.
I will admit,
but not in defeat,
that I am.
(still)
angry.
Footnote: A reflection on catharsis and the strange beauty in feeling fully. The truth is, it can be frightening, disorienting even, to experience our emotions – especially the intense ones. Numbing or avoiding them is a coping mechanism many of us adopt. This poem explores the power and release found in confronting strong feelings, emphasizing that acknowledging our emotions is essential to align with ourselves and the life we want to create. Doing so can be profoundly liberating – breathing movement into stagnancy and creating space for healing to take place.
-
Here I sit
in my chair
thinking of strips
on a watermelon
I suppose
they remind me
of imprisonment
the repetitious dullness
of living
a spirit
in captivity
mechanically
spiritless
rallying up
the number of days
of boredom
tick tick
goes the pencil
tick tick
goes the clock
striking away
at my lifeline
like a matchstick
and I wonder
what would it be like
to go on a strike
instead of sitting in this chair
so mundane-like
because then
I would not be sitting here
unimaginatively
thinking of
watermelons
Footnote: The commonly shared sentiment of following the “right path” or “expected path”, which doesn’t always lead to personal fulfillment.
-
what are we doing?
swimming out in the dark,
paddling further and further away
from the city lights
on a mad hunt for adventure.
restless fervor beating through our veins
as we push through the surface
spluttering,
every now and then
at the spray of the ocean
yet drawn to the taste of danger.
skin soaked, clothes heavy
we are rising, falling, and sinking
the warm seawater laps at our necks and cheeks
strumming, thrumming onto our backs and chests
occasionally caressing our eyelids
face flushed in between fever and passion
drunk on the rolling of the tides
tossing, turning, reeling, and tumbling
seduced into their confines
you had promised me a good view
despite knowing my fear of the dark
you lulled my demons, swayed me into submission
by igniting my impulsive spark
but
what are we doing?
it doesn’t feel right
swallowing saltwater in the night
submerged in an unfamiliar
territory
not a single soul out in our sight
naïve and trusting, but ever so uneasy
my movements have become tired and slow
the waters churn
they lurch and surge
plunging me from high to low
wearing thin, I am afraid
of this element engulfing me
but you did say
that only I can fix you
so here we are in this raging sea
crashing waves
thrashing my body
and I know
that the bruises are forming
yet I can’t seem to find the heart
to head back to the start
I can still hear the ocean’s calling
for out in this sea, you did say you needed me
it’s two of us against the world
for every blow, I still intend to follow
so, into the sea we go
into the sea we go
yet I’m sick of the to and fro
I’m winded, depleted, entirely defeated
and I’ll have to deal with this tomorrow.
what are we doing?
no – what are you doing?
you’re not giving me time to breathe
deeper and deeper into the foamy depths
to the murky kingdom beneath
I’m a wreck, let us go back
the violence of the current still shocks me
you would think that by now
I’d be stronger
but the truth is
I am slowly drowning
and amidst it all
the deranged sea motions
I finally saw the turmoil reflected in your eyes
in disbelief, vulnerable as it is
I cried while unraveling your lies
heaving, broken
you destroyed my trust
I should have known that your eyes were full of storm
I took a breath, and tore away for the shore
it’s time for me to go
home
Footnote: A reflection on heartbreak and the difficulty of letting go of unhealthy relationships. Emotions can feel like a vast, unpredictable sea – overwhelming, confusing, and relentless. This poem symbolizes the experience of being caught in those currents and the challenge of finding your way back to safety, clarity, and self-compassion. Being swept by the current can sometimes be part of learning how to swim again.
-
I sit in the vortex
of a home
and yet
I am unhappy.
I wonder
if belonging is a myth,
or if my roots
refuse the soil
they were given.
Footnote: A reminder that appearances can be deceiving. What looks whole from the outside may be fractured within. A house may stand, its walls intact, yet still echo with dissonance. A house, after all, does not always mean home.
-
"Fairy Lights":
The most magical thing in the world. Under its austerity, there is something so warm, so kind, so sincere, so forgiving, and opulently imaginative about it. It makes you feel as if you, a lost traveler, has stumbled upon your very own Xanadu. Intoxicated by the beautiful suddenness of it all, you enter, like a child, a small smile that hasn't been there a while ago, trembles delicately on your lips - and you, you soak it all in, the quiescence, the amenity, in awe, in wonder, with gratitude, in a daze: "is this a dream?" you murmur; yet not waiting for an answer, you delight in the ever-replenishing comfort and nostalgia, knowing, but not ready to know, that one day you'll have to go back.
And so, just like that, you become inaccessible to the outside world. Just for that one moment, in an unrepentant time and place, you realize with a profound amazement that you have everything you've ever desired, everything you'll ever want, right here, right now.
And so, you stay.
Footnote: An appreciation for what your inner child loves.
-
A homage:
as we welcome the new,
never forget the old,
never forget the past.
we may make the future,
but history still makes us.
Footnote: Don’t seek to break ties with what has passed – seek to make it part of your story. Like in many Indigenous worldviews, the past is not behind us but walks with us, shaping who we are.
-
A dance with the rising sun
in worship of its vibrancy,
in hope that as we embark on yet another rotation around it,
we’ll expand into the flow and opulence of living,
breathe into our highest potential,
invite in love and nourishment,
and manifest each and every one
of our own definition of warmth, richness, and happiness.
Footnote: A blessing to the beginning of a chapter.